Mutiny

The poster (the dark one with Statham looking left) makes it look like *Die Hard* (on purpose, I'm guessing), and the plot synopsis makes it sound like *Under Siege*. It's both and neither, at the same time.  Jason Statham has become a movie genre of its own right, and this one fits neatly into that genre. It's not philosophical, or interested in the human condition, nor can it be said the be a character study. There are no characters here, only "dossiers", that lets you know what kinda person this is – usually deadly, ex-military or mercenary. The plot is ultra-thin, there's just enough of it to justify Statham killing a metric fuckton of bad guys. Formulaic, sure, but we don't come to a Statham movie for the intricate plot with intelligent twists, do we? Maybe not Statham’s best, but certainly good enough for fans to devour with relish. There's some really good mêlée choreography here, and while you can see Jason getting steadily older, he can still pack a punch.

There was a time when I looked forward to Jason Statham films. He fits the action genre comfortably, mixing man of action with enough depth and thoughtfulness to remain interesting. It's a shame, then, to see his films become as formulaic as "Mutiny". This is a deeply superficial action flick that sets up a basic human trafficking at sea scenario, backed by caricature mercenary bad guys facing off against an ex-military/police hero in the form of Statham. What comes next is predictable, repetitive, and frankly rather bland. No true insights into anyone's motives, no witty narrative or general creativity. In summary, a superficially watchable but also wholly forgettable action romp.  

Sierbahnn

This is not Transporter. This is not the Beekeeper, but it is certainly better than the Mechanic and at least half a dozen other movies that are pretty much exactly like this. Jason does his Jason thing and he does so very proficiently and this time he's backed up by a functioning script and good antagonist and even a supporting cast that you can get behind. The action is good, the effects are decent and overall it's just a good time.

CinemaSerf

Disgraced British policeman "Cole" has landed on his feet looking after the personal safety of a kindly shipping magnate who runs an global operation from his home in Bangkok. Just as he is about to sell his company, though, "Tibu" (Ramon Tikaram) and his bodyguard find themselves ambushed, the former assassinated and the latter man framed for the crime and declared outlaw. One thing our hero does know is that some cops are in on the killing and that one of the now dead assassins was due to work aboard one of the company's freighters. Stowing away aboard the giant "Artemis", he quickly finds himself embroiled in some unsavoury nautical activites with only the recently drafted third mate "Ellis" (Annabelle Wallis) on his side. With the heavily armed crew under the command of the menacing captain (Roland Møller) bent on ensuring he goes swimming with concrete boots, what chance "Cole" can survive their pursuit and then hopefully avenge the death of his friend? No, jeopardy there isn't and I am afraid to say that this vehicle for Statham is really repetitive and actually quite dull. For a start, he seems to rapdily acquaint himself with this massive vessel and gets from bow to stern as if he were Grant Gustin (or Ezra Miller) - all whilst proving as bullet and knife-proof as a man with Kevlar skin. Møller isn't remotely intimidating - though there is some fun with an axe towards the end, and that conclusion is both rushed and leaves room for "Mutiny Too". This is all standard Sky television fayre that effortlessly passes ninety minutes but don't look for anything innovative or distinguishing or you'll be disappointed.